Agonising over a decision? 7 gems of advice from genius thinkers
Are you agonising over a particular decision?
I find myself in these convos a lot lately, so here are some gems of insight from a range of thinkers.
1. Broaden your options - Chip and Dan Heath
Very few things in life actually boil down to a binary decision. See if you can add a third option, which will broaden your perspective and ease some of the weight of decision making.
2. Narrow your pool of expert advisors - Glennon Doyle
Ok I'm wildly paraphrasing, but Glennon recommends that you don't poll the world to find out what you should do. Look inward, check in with your values and your gut instinct. (Said more poetically - 'Wanderer, there is no path, the path is made by walking'.)
3. Experiment with it - Digby Scott
How can you test out the different options, without a huge commitment? Eg can you start running a side hustle, before you launch into full-time employment? Experiment and observe what happens.
4. Err towards action over inaction - Dan Pink
We regret the things we don't do, more than the things we do do. So err towards the active choice, rather than the passive default.
5. Aim to satisfice, not maximise - Barry Schwartz
While you want more than 2 options (as noted above), you also don't need 600 options to choose from. Because although you might get an objectively better outcome (eg airfare, pair of jeans, boyfriend), you've also massively increased the perceived opportunity cost, and you'll be less happy with what you choose. Identify your deal-breakers, and then select an option that you'll be happy enough with from there. Satisfice - ie satisfy the core need, but sacrifice your need to get the perfect outcome.
6. Don't spend too long in uncertainty - Dan Gilbert
Uncertainty is worse for your brain than a definite outcome, because once 'your fate is sealed', your psychological immune system kicks in, and helps you to post-hoc rationalise why you wanted this thing all along. (Check out his TED talk, Stumbling on Happiness, for more on this.)
7. Remember that nothing in life matters as much as you think it does, while you're thinking about it - Dan Kahneman, Nobel Prize winner
When we're focused on a decision, it gets our full attention in a way that it won't, in normal life. Normal life is broad, and your wellbeing is a function of many variables. Don't over-index on the importance of this one thing.
What and who would you add to this list?
x Renee from Thrive Lab